Among the Strong
Mar. 7th, 2025 06:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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marysuevirusTitle: Among the Strong
Chapter Forty One: Breaking Point
Fandom: the Marvel universe
Rating: 18 and up
Warnings: graphic violence, language, sex, dark themes, anything else i can toss in.
Disclaimer: the recognizable characters and places contained herein are the property of Marvel. i'm merely borrowing for the sake of entertainment. no money is being made from this venture. Haley belongs todazzledfirestar Morgan belongs toginevra Roxxy belongs tonanaeanaven Jehnna belongs to silverfox_chan and Dare belongs to me. the concept and title of The Mary Sue Virus are used with permission from dazzledfirestar .
Author's Notes: this is almost entirely Daz's fault. okay. so it really isn't. its actually almost 100% my fault. Daz just did a whole lot of encouraging. this fic is going to be kind of dark, so please keep that in mind while reading.
Among the Strong - the index
She was cowed by a baby. A tiny human being had her, one of the strongest telepaths on the planet, afraid of it. The whole thing would have been laughable had it not been so pathetic. Had it been happening to someone else. This whole thing was turning out to be a disaster and she wasn’t sure how she was going to turn it around. How in the world was she being thwarted by a newborn?
She liked to think she was capable of dealing with new situations, that she was good at handling new people. The problem was, she couldn’t use her normal methods with a baby. There were no thought processes to use as a guide. There was no way to drop a mental suggestion here and there to push things in a direction she wanted them to go. Whatever thoughts a baby had were too ephemeral and short to really touch. To shift and shape. They weren’t even really thoughts the way most people understood them. Just a vague, fleeting thing that had no shape or feel to it. She’d never tell anyone she’d tried. It was humiliating that she’d been so unsuccessful with her attempt to convince her husband’s baby to like her as much as her mother. Maybe better. And she’d never live it down if she admitted doing such a thing to anyone.
Taking a breath, she made another attempt to hold the girl. With careful movements, she once more lifted the child from her little bounce chair into her arms. And, as with every other attempt she’d made, the moment the baby was cradled against her chest, the squalling started anew. Loudly. Unendingly. Annoyingly.
God, her head hurt.
The whole time spent with the child had been like this. The child simply wouldn’t stop crying, no matter what she did. She’d tried using a soft, sweet voice. She’d tried singing. She’d tried gently bouncing the girl. She’d tried rocking the girl. She’d tried everything she could think of to convince the baby to quit crying. None of it had worked and all that noise was giving her one hell of a headache. She turned wide, confused eyes Scott’s way and made sure she looked appropriately sad and kind of pathetic. “I don’t understand it! What am I doing wrong?” Jean asked, her voice wet with the threat of tears.
It had been her idea to help Scott take care of the child. Some part of her still felt like she could convince him to allow her to adopt the girl as her own. Since it didn’t seem like he was going to give up playing father to her. She’d thought, if she showed him that she could be a mother, too, that he’d be willing to entertain the idea of Jean becoming her mother. But every time she picked up the girl, all she did was cry and wail. It was very frustrating.
“I don’t know, Jean,” Scott said, reaching over to scoop the baby out of her arms. She got the distinct idea that he was growing tired of her behavior. She swore she’d seen him roll his eyes, despite the fact that there really wasn’t any way to be certain. Damn the glasses. “Emilia never cries like this.”
The moment he settled the baby in his arms, she quieted and stared up at him with big brown eyes that were so much like his. There was unconditional love in the girl’s gaze. And her lips shifted into what looked like a tiny smile. Something about the idea that he could calm the girl so easily rubbed Jean the wrong way. Even worse was the implication that the baby had never once cried like this with Haley. “Then I guess that means there’s something wrong with me,” she responded, voice tart with her irritation.
Scott turned to look her way. She didn’t have to see his eyes to know that he was staring at her in a way that she wouldn’t like. Finally, after a long moment of silent staring, Scott offered her a smile that held pity. “There’s no shame in not being able to quiet Emilia’s crying, Jean. Not everyone is cut out to be a mother.”
The comment was like a knife to the heart. She was almost one hundred percent sure that Scott had meant it to sound like the insult it was. But she couldn’t be certain because, as the days had passed since his return, her ability to read his thoughts had gotten more difficult. As if he was shielding them from her. Or as if something was interfering with the ability. She didn’t like that idea one bit.
Uncharitable thoughts filled her head. Ones about how some of the members of Purple Team weren’t cut out to be mothers. She didn’t think Jehnna or Roxxy were terrible in the mothering department. They were both gentle women by nature, nurturing and kind. Technically, she didn’t have issues with Haley as a mother. She just had issues with the woman being mother to her husband’s daughter. And she wouldn’t get into just how unsuited for parenting she felt both Morgan and Dare were.
There was no way she would give voice to her opinions, though. She felt certain, deep in her heart, that Scott would defend the two women. She really had nothing against them as X-Men. Their team was well put together. They worked so well with one another that it almost seemed as if they’d worked together all their lives. And even beyond. Individually, however, she wasn’t sure she liked all of them as people.
She pushed thoughts of Purple Team aside and focused on the here and now. Scott still cradled the child to his chest, the soft smile he wore gentling the usual seriousness on his face. It was a look that made her heart beat a little faster, that made her feel soft and warm on the inside. But it also made her heart ache because the look should have been for their child. And then her heart ached some more when she recalled that he’d given that look to Haley. She’d seen him do it with her own two eyes. He’d no doubt done it many, many times during their captivity.
The sound of the baby fussing brought her out of her thoughts. That tiny face was screwed up with displeasure, obviously on the way toward a full blown cry. Scott bounced and rocked the girl to no avail. For a moment, Jean felt a perverse sense of satisfaction that he seemed to be having issues with his daughter. “Okay, sweetheart. I understand. You’re hungry,” Scott said, offering the baby that same soft smile. He continued to rock from side to side, his attention focused solely on his daughter. “I guess that means its time to take you back to your mother so she can feed you.”
Was it Jean’s imagination or did Scott sound a little happy about that?
“I’ll be back in a little bit, Jean. I’m just going to take Emilia back to Haley,” Scott told her, already in the process of gathering up the few things he’d pulled out of the bag they’d brought with them when they’d picked the baby up some hours ago.
“I’ll come with you, Scott,” Jean replied, keeping the relief she felt out of her words. He gave her a look for a moment, then shrugged a shoulder.
“If you really want to. All I’m doing is handing Emilia off to Haley.”
“Still. This was my idea. I should, at the least, be along when you return her,” Jean insisted. She was getting an odd feeling from him and there was no way she was about to let him go down there by himself. There was no telling just what he and Haley would get up to if she didn’t keep an eye on them. She could still plainly see him sitting in bed with the other woman, arms around her, while he stared at the child she held with a look of wonder on his face. And she could still hear him telling Haley he loved her. She could still hear the depth of feeling he’d put into those words. And she could still feel the pain that lanced through her, as fresh and as sharp as it had been that very day.
Maybe there was too much insistence in her voice. Or too much emotion. Because Scott shot her a look that made her think he knew something was going on. But the moment passed and he nodded his head in agreement. “Very well. If you like.”
She didn’t really like, but she wasn’t about to tell him that, So she took the baby bag from him and looped it over her shoulder, then allowed him to hold the door for her. They stepped out into the hall, the silence between them strained and crackling with tension. She got the impression he really hadn’t wanted to agree with her decision. But telling her so would have created problems and he had been trying so hard not to create any further problems for them. To be honest, she thought he’d been walking on egg shells around her. She mostly disliked it, because it felt like they were drifting further and further apart every day. But she also liked it far more than she wanted to admit, but something about his careful behavior made her feel powerful.
They rode the elevator down to the sub-basement level on which the suites were located. Scott rocked the baby the entire time, singing to her softly in an endearingly off-key way. Once upon a time, he’d sung to Jean in the same voice. That wasn’t something that happened anymore and she felt that she could lay the blame for that at Haley’s feet.
It felt like she blamed Haley for a lot of her problems lately.
It didn’t take long to reach their chosen floor and the doors slid open to an empty hallway. Scott started forward, not bothering to wait and allow Jean out of the elevator before him. She followed behind him, her temper slowly building. It wasn’t like him to step through any door before her. He’d always made of point of allowing her to go through before he did. It was one of the things she’d always loved about him. So many people saw him as uptight and seriously. But she’d gotten to know him, gotten to see the gentler side of him. And Scott was always a gentleman. This behavior… It was so unlike him.
They arrived at the door to the suite where Haley was presently residing and Scott took one hand away from his baby in order to rap his knuckles against the wooden panel. After several moments, the door opened. Haley looked as if she’d been sleeping, her hair mussed and a robe thrown on over whatever it was she wore underneath. For a moment, just the barest stretch of time, she smiled at Scott. Then she noticed Jean and the smile slid away and a blank expression settled onto her face.
Jean’s temper jumped up another notch.
“I didn’t expect you back so soon,” Haley said. Scott offered her a faintly embarrassed look before glancing down at the baby.
“Emilia is getting fussy. I think she’s hungry,” he replied. The tone of his voice made Jean think he wasn’t certain about his assessment. She had to fight not to frown at the two of them. “I’m sorry for waking you. I didn’t think you’d be sleeping.”
Haley shrugged a shoulder, as if it wasn’t a big deal. The shoulder of her robe shifted to expose an expanse of pale skin. Jean couldn’t miss the way Scott seemed to react. As if that small patch of flesh was enough to turn him on. “Dare is out. Logan came to collect her a while ago. I thought I’d take advantage of the quiet to try and get a nap in. Between her and Emilia, sleep is sometimes hard to come by.”
“How’s Dare doing?” The question came out sounding casual, but there was something in Scott’s posture that pointed toward tension. Jean knew him well enough to see the signs. She knew he valued all of his X-Men so it made sense he’d ask. But it almost felt like something more than common courtesy. Curious.
“She’s getting better. She’s got her appetite fully back and she’s working on getting her strength back. She can make it across her bedroom now without help.”
“That’s good. I’m glad,” he told her. The baby took that moment to start whimpering. It prompted Scott to shift her from his hold into Haley’s arms. Jean frowned when the baby quieted immediately, her mouth rooting around against Haley’s chest. Scott was silent a moment, then he raked a hand through his hair. “You know you can call on me to watch Emilia if you need to sleep. I don’t like the idea that you’re wearing yourself out by taking care of both Emilia and Dare without help.”
For a moment, there was a flash of emotion in Haley’s eyes. Then she shifted her attention to the baby in her arms. “I’m fine, Scott. And Dare has other people to look after her. I’m not the only one.”
“You need someone to look after you,” he said softly. Even so, there was no missing the emotion laced through his words. It made Jean want to reach out and slap Haley. How dare she make Scott fall in love with her! He was a married man. He belonged to Jean.
“I’m fine, Scott,” Haley repeated.
“Damn it, Haley,” Scott snapped. He fell silent, then, but Jean got the distinct impression that there was something going on. The few times she’d seen the two of them together, she’d gotten the same impression. In fact, she felt like Scott had a better understanding of what was happening with Haley than he let on. “You’re exhausting yourself. I can tell.”
There was certainty in his voice that bothered Jean. Like he literally knew it for a fact. There’d been a lot of that lately, That mysterious certainty that she wasn’t sure she liked. She’d been noticing things like that since he’d returned to the school. He’d been acting like he knew what Haley was actually feeling. Like when she’d gone into labor. Scott had just woken up and gone off like he’d… known.
Jean frowned. She was suddenly reminded of the link Haley had formed with both Piotr and Johnny after the alien life form had invaded. The professor had never figured out the purpose or how the bond had formed. But Jean knew Haley had used it to hunt down and rescue Johnny when Doom had captured the Fantastic Four. Was it possible that she’d formed a bond with Scott? They’d spent a year locked in a room together, after all.
That had to be it. Haley had created a link between herself and Scott. And it was interfering with Scott’s relationship with Jean. It was messing with his head, making him think he loved the other woman. Pulling him away from the life he’d made with Jean. Destroying the life they’d made together.
“Really, Scott. I’m okay.” Jean barely heard the words. Her blood was boiling, rage making thinking next to impossible. She was lost to the idea that Haley was trying to steal Scott away from her. That he was pulling away from her in favor of the other woman. And there was nothing she could do to stop it.
No. That wasn’t right. There absolutely was something she could do. Tuning out the faint argument Haley and Scott were having, Jean let her powers expand, let them slip into Haley’s mind. She let it touch thoughts and memories, her temper shooting higher when she caught flashes of intimate moments, of soft sigh and seeking hands and bodies twisting and shifting in unison. Of completion and pleasure and desire and happiness and belonging so intense that it almost stole her breath. She pushed on, putting distance between herself and those memories, until she found what she was looking for.
There was a small room in Haley’s mind that held three different glowing balls of light. The faintest one was a silvery-blue, a sense of gentleness emanating from it that said it was the link she’d formed with Piotr. The second was a twisting ball of flame. Jean didn’t have to touch it to know it was the link that connected her to Johnny. The third and final ball of bright red, like the optic blasts that were representative of Scott’s power. Both it, and the fire ball, glowed with the same intensity, suggesting they were both strong. Suggesting Haley’s connection to the two men they represented was strong.
Not for much longer.
Jean gathered her powers around her and slipped them around the link. She thought she vaguely heard Scott and Haley fall silent and gasp in surprise. But she ignored them and focused on that link. She shaped her powers into a hammer and swung them with all her might, aiming for the ball.
“Jean, what the hell are you doing?” Scott’s voice was faint and distant. Her hammer slammed up against the ball. She swore she heard it hit, like a hammer coming down against an anvil. Sparks flew, the glowing red of Scott’s power. Then they were white, burning bright and brighter as they flew toward her. Jean tried to erect a shield, but the white light enveloped her. Pain ran through her, white-hot and electrical, making her think she’d been struck by lightning.
It was the last thought she had before the white light vanished and left nothing but darkness in its wake.
~*~*~*~*~
Dare stared at the door before her, fear and trepidation spiraling through her like a tornado. The two emotions chewed up everything in their path until she was left frozen, unable to convince herself to take that last step forward. Opening that door, going through it into the room beyond, was suddenly the last thing she wanted to do.
“You’re stallin’ fer no reason, Dare. It’ll all be okay,” Logan said gently. He was at her side, one arm wound around her in a protective measure. It was also to help hold her up, physically as well as mentally. She was getting stronger, but she still wobbled more than she didn’t, and she was silently thankful for his presence. “They ain’t gonna care about what happened.”
She glanced to the baby held securely in her arms, arms that she pretended weren’t shaking a little, before shifting her attention to his face. There was a faint smile pulling his mouth up as he looked back, and the clear blue of his eyes was filled with certainty.
“I thought I was ready for this. But its starting to feel like I was wrong,” she whispered. He lifted a brow at her response, his look turning questioning.
“The Dare I know ain’t scared of nothing’,” he responded, his voice bright with belief and emphasis.
She looked away, her gaze returning to the closed panel. “I’m scared of everything, Logan,” she whispered. It was a painful truth, one that was hard to admit. But it was still the truth. If she was going to try and repair her relationships with everyone, if she was serious about dealing with her problems, she had to let some of the armor she’d crafted crack apart. Let it fall away to expose the vulnerable parts of her that had lain hidden beneath for far, far too long.
“You think I don’t know that, darlin’?” he asked, his voice as soft as hers. She turned to look at him again. The smile had faded, replaced by a look of seriousness that seemed much more at home on his face. Come to think of it, she’d seen the serious look a lot more back when she’d first met him. The smiling hadn’t really become a thing until they’d become a couple. He had so many different types of smiles and they all made him look like a different person. She didn’t know what she’d done to deserve those smiles, but she was determined to earn each and every one of them. As well as the ones that would follow.
“You never said anything,” she replied steadily.
“You ain’t a hero because you’re not scared of anything,” he told her. “Being scared of things makes you human, Facing the things you fear, fightin’ despite being afraid… That’s what makes ya a hero. And you gotta be one of the bravest people I know.”
The stark, genuine honesty in his voice brought tears to her eyes. She glanced away, staring at Petra’s face while she willed the tears to go away. She didn’t understand how he was always so kind and gentle with her. Especially not now when all this had happened. Then again, she’d never understood just what it was he’d seen in her all those years ago. She’d been a scared, royally fucked up kid with so many issues. Hell, she was still scared and royally fucked up. With all those original issues and an added bonus of so many more. Only now she was masquerading as an adult.
When she finally had herself together, she looked back up at him with a hint of a smile on her face. “Thank you, Logan,” she told him quietly. “For everything.”
“There’s no reason ta thank me, Dare. I love ya,” he responded, as if that explained everything. And maybe it did. She still felt like she didn’t deserve it. But she was going to do her best to not belittle that gift by giving voice to her doubts. She knew for a fact that Logan didn’t deserve hearing her say that about him and the love he so freely and willingly gave her.
“I love you, too,” she replied. And she did. She didn’t know when or how or why she’d fallen in love with him. But she had. And she kind of felt like they were the weirdest, oddest couple ever. She also felt like she wouldn’t have made it this far without him at her side. Knowing he was going to be by her side for what was beyond that wooden panel helped her draw her bravery around herself. And she reached determinedly for the door, twisting the knob so she could push it open.
Dare had barely made it over the threshold before the lights came on and a group of excited children called out “Surprise!” in the best inside voices she’d ever heard them use. Petra stirred slightly in her arms, but otherwise remained quiet and not at all startled. She let her eyes take in the scene before her, very much confused and in a bit of shock.
It was the suite that she’d been meant to share with Remy. It remained unfinished, with a single couch and a pair of chairs taking up space in the middle of the floor. End tables with lamps settled upon them and a coffee table that looked heavy rounded out the only furniture in the room. The ceiling was covered from wall to wall with balloons. They were the same shades of blue and purple as the streaks that colored her hair. And soft pink, obviously meant to welcome Petra. Someone had gone overboard with cheesy crepe paper streamers that proclaimed, in pink words, ‘Its at girl!’, covering every inch of all four walls with the stuff. Between the streamers and the balloons, it looked like a movie version of someone’s high school prom.
The coffee table was laden with snack foods and drinks. There were so many snacks and drinks, in fact, that someone had set a card table up in the corner to hold the rest of them. And there was yet another table, a smaller one, that held an array of brightly wrapped packages. A lump formed in Dare’s throat while tears filled her eyes. Love swelled in her chest. The love she felt for her children. And the love they felt for her. She was left wondering how she’d ever believed that her children would look at her and see a dirty, filthy whore. “My poppets,” she said softly, voice watery with tears and thick with all of the love she had for her family.
She hated herself for almost destroying all of this.
“Come on, darlin’,” Logan said, standing at her side. The arm he had around her nudged her into motion and she headed toward the couch. Almost before she was settled, her children were crowding around her.
“Mumma! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!” Cam and Ken chanted joyously.
Jessalyn climbed up onto the couch beside Dare, sitting as close to her as she could get without crawling into her lap. Her gaze was fixed on Petra, who stared back at Jess intently. Logan took a seat on Dare’s other side, one hand reaching out to very gently stroke a finger over Petra’s cheek. It was an odd, cozy picture. One she’d never expected to see and one for which she was so terribly grateful.
“We missed you, mum,” Liam said, voice rough and low. Dare put that down to embarrassment. She made no comment on his discomfort, instead offering him a smile that might have wobbled. Just a little bit.
“I missed you, too, love,” she said, her gaze locked on his face. She knew her son felt like the odd one out. How could he not, surrounded as he was by nothing but sisters. So she tried, as much as she could, to make sure he knew he was just as amazing and special as the rest of his siblings. She didn’t miss the way his ears reddened before he turned away to go mess around at the secondary snack table. Then she turned her attention to the rest of her children, letting her gaze rest on their faces one by one. “I missed all of you so much. I can’t believe you did all this for me!”
“And for our new sister,” Jess pointed out, her little hand motioning toward Petra to ensure Dare didn’t forget she was there.
“Of course,” she responded with a smile. She let her gaze slide around the room once more, this time letting it touch on each of her children. Cam and Ken stood at her knees, both eyeing her sister like she was a new toy to play with. Dare was sure they knew better, but they were still young. Jess was practically vibrating with joy as she sat beside her mother, her attention entirely on the baby Dare held. Liam was still at the snack table, his back to them. No doubt he was trying to get his embarrassment under control so he looked cool and calm and not at all like a lost little boy who thought he’d never see his mother again. She finally found Dee, who sat in one of the chairs. She’d pulled her knees up to her chest, her arms wrapped around her legs while her chin rested on her bent knees. She looked like the same little girl she’d always been. And she looked like a young woman, just coming into her prime. She saw Dare staring and smiled a wide, sweet, genuinely happy smile.
“Mumma.” Cameron said, her little girl’s voice filled with as much seriousness as she could fit into it. It brought Dare’s gaze back to the children at her knees. Cam was staring at Petra now, her gaze intense and considering.
“Yes, poppet. What is it?” she asked, giving her attention to the girl.
“Uncle Remy is Petra’s Da?” she asked. There was a moment where she stumbled over Petra’s name, but her question was clear enough.
“He is,” Dare confirmed. She had no doubt that Logan had already talked to their children about Petra’s parentage, but she’d been asked a question directly and she wasn’t going to lie. Not even to the youngest of her offspring. She’d have to explain it to them someday, but it wasn’t that day yet.
Cam nodded and turned to look at Mckenna. The two of them stared at one another for several long moments before they turned to look at Dare. “Uncle Remy is Da now?” Ken asked, voice filled with confusion and curiosity.
“No, poppet. Da is still your da,” she told the girl, one hand reaching out to rest on Logan’s leg. “Uncle Remy is still Uncle Remy, unless he decides he wants to be something else. But that’s up to him. And you have to have his permission to call him something else. For now, keep calling him Uncle Remy. Okay?”
Cam and Ken shared a second look before they turned back to her and nodded their heads. “Okay.”
“Mumma?” The word came from beside her. Dare turned her attention to Jessalyn.
“What is it, my girl?” she asked.
“Can I hold Petra?” Jess’ voice was a mix of hope and fear. She likely thought she was going to be told no.
“Of course you can,” Dare replied. “First, you need to sit up straight. And then cross your legs.” Jess did as she was told, straightening her back and bringing her legs up to sit with them crossed so that they created a natural cradle. Dare shifted slightly, turning so that it would be easier to settle Petra in Jess’ lap. “One arm under her head to support it, poppet. And don’t get flustered if she starts crying. Babies will cry if they don’t feel safe.”
“Okay, Mumma,” Jess nodded. Dare shifted Petra into Jess’ lap, making sure one of her arms was positioned under Petra’s head so that it was properly supported. There was a moment or two of fussing, then Jess got Petra settled comfortably and the fussing quieted. Petra stared up at her sister with wide eyes, bringing a big smile to Jess’ face.
“You look better, Mum,” Dee said. She’d left her seat while Dare had been putting Petra in Jess’ lap and now stood near the couch. Her eyes were focused intently on Dare’s face and her smile had dimmed some. “I was worried.”
Dare heard what Dee hadn’t said. She’d been scared. No doubt she’d been imagining all kinds of things the past few weeks. She wasn’t sure how Dee’s visions worked. They hadn’t gotten a chance to talk about it much. But it was possible they’d shown her things that had fueled her worry and fear. Dare got to her feet and wrapped Dee up in her embrace. She made sure to put her mouth next to Dee’s ear. “I’m so sorry I worried you, poppet,” Dare whispered so that she was sure no one else, save Logan, would be able to hear her.
Dee hugged her almost too tightly, as if afraid to let go. “I knew you would be okay. But I still worried.” You still scared me.
It felt like it took ages for Dee to loosen her grip. When she did, Dare pulled away to see that her eyes glimmered with tears. Logan had told her that Dee was the one who’d held everyone together while Dare had been gone. While she’d been hiding and doing… whatever the fuck it was she’d been doing. Now that the danger had passed and everything was finally over, Dee’s naturally happy personality was giving way to the fear and worry she hadn’t shown to anyone. Dare’s heart squeezed tight with the knowledge that she’d hurt her daughter like this. How did she fix it? Words wouldn’t do the trick.
The only way she could think of was to show Dee, and everyone else, that she was going to do better. To be better. She squeezed Dee this time, hugging her so tightly that her daughter squeaked in her hold. When she let go, she pressed a kiss to Dee’s cheek. A silent promise to be the kind of mother she needed. To never let her down again.
“Enough of this emotional crap,” Liam’s voice, still rough, cut across the room and broke Dare away from Dee. They turned to look at him and found he was holding one of the brightly wrapped gifts in his hand. “Let’s open these presents and get this party started.”
Cam and Ken jumped up and down, clapping and cheering at the suggestion. Jess, still cradling her sister close, nodded her head in agreement. Even Dee, when Dare looked at her, was smiling. She motioned to the couch, silently telling Dare she should return to her seat. So she sat, taking her place next to Logan. He slung an arm around her shoulder and drew her close, dropping a kiss on her cheek before leaning in so he could speak in her ear. “Told ya you were worried for nothin’. The kids love ya. And so do I,” he said, one of his hands taking hers and squeezing it gently.
Liam brought the gift and settled it into her lap, silently telling her to open it. Dare’s fingers tugged lightly at the bow on the top, a pale mint green that somehow went with the pastel pink wrapping paper. The bow came off easily enough, as did the paper it had been sitting on. Inside the box was a set of rattles, teething rings, and pacifiers. A card had been left inside the box. She took the time to read the sentiment written in the card. And then she looked at the signature. Liam had signed his name as neatly as he could inside the card, along with ‘I love you.’
Dare felt her heart swell and warmth washed through her. She was once more reminded that she had amazing, wonderful children. And she was going to do everything she could to ensure that she showed them how much she loved them.
Every day.
For the rest of her life.
~*~*~*~*~
Johnny stared at the button, his feet willing to obey the orders his brain had given him. Just a few steps forward. Lift one hand. Use a finger to push the button. That was all he had to do. But doubt was rearing its ugly head, making his brain rebel against the idea of doing so. Because actually doing it meant he had to put his anger aside and really, truly, make an attempt at communication.
He’d spent several days thinking on his conversation with Peter. Really thinking. Because Pete had made so many good points. Johnny had been going around with his head up his ass. He hadn’t stopped once to think about Haley and what she’d been going through. He owed her an apology for doing that. And for walking away from her the way he had. He knew just how bad things had gotten. He’d never seen her crack the way she had that night when Dare had almost died. He was certain she was shouldering all of her problems, and taking one some that didn’t even exist because she felt she’d failed her team. He’d been with her long enough to know how she thought.
He needed to step forward and activate the portal. He needed to be a man about the whole thing and remind Haley that he loved her. And it didn’t matter that Emilia was Summers’ child. Johnny would love her like one of his own. How could he not? She was Haley’s daughter. Hell, he was even willing to make peace with Summers. He knew Haley would never deny the man his child. Maybe, if he could set things right with the other man, he could teach his son how to be a man that anybody would be proud to know. He’d gone wrong with Spencer somewhere and he didn’t know where. Worse, he didn’t know how to make it better. But he couldn’t help Spencer fix his issues if Johnny didn’t first fix his own.
Taking a breath, he paced forward three steps and brought one hand up. Used a finger to press the button. The mechanical part of the portal hummed and whirred. Then it opened and showed him the suite where Haley was staying. After another fortifying breath, Johnny stepped forward.
Haley was at the door when he came through. The door, which stood open and showed him Scott and Jean standing on the other side. Summers’ jaw was tensed, marking him as unhappy about something. Jean looked… Johnny couldn’t be sure what the expression on the woman’s face meant. But something skittered down his spine, as if in warning, and he found himself in motion before he understood why.
“Really, Scott,” Haley was saying. She sounded slightly defensive. And tired. Johnny could hear the exhaustion in her voice. Worse, he could feel it. It carried to him through their link. “I’m okay.”
Summers’ face said he didn’t believe it. And he looked like he wanted to say something. His mouth opened, maybe to call Haley on her bullshit. But he said nothing, instead turning his attention to the woman standing at his side. There was a hint of shock and anger on his face. “Jean, what the hell are you doing?” Johnny thought he heard a faint thread of pain in the man’s voice. Johnny watched in confusion as Summers staggered backward, into the wall directly behind him, where he slid limply to the floor. And then he saw the look on Jean’s face, one of confusion and fear. It was gone in a moment, replaced by a mask of pain and a soundless scream. Jean hit the floor hard and didn’t move.
Fear pulsed through him as his attention turned to Haley. It was to see she wobbled where she stood, her body kind of propped up against the door. She was going to go down and he couldn’t, he wouldn’t, let that happen. Johnny put on some speed, praying to whomever was listening to grant him the strength to reach her before she went down. His heart was in his throat, along with the sharp taste of bile brought on by the rush of fear. The room was a blur around him, his focus entirely on Haley as she seemed to teeter in slow motion. Jesus fuck, she was going to go down and he wouldn’t get there in time.
“Haley!” he called out.
And then she was cradled in his arms. He was sitting on his ass on the floor and Haley was cradled safely in his arms. She was white, her eyes open and rolled up. He could see her mouth working, but nothing was coming out. God, she was soft and real in his arms. Relief rushed through him. But it only lasted a moment,
Because a baby’s sharp cry, one filled with fear, reached his ears and he realized that Haley had Emilia cradled in her arms. He didn’t know what had happened, but he thought it was a safe bet that Jean was somehow involved. “Johnny?” Haley asked, her green eyes sort of looking at his face. It was obvious she couldn’t focus on him. Hell, she probably didn’t even really see him.
“Shh. Its me, babe. I’m here. Don’t worry. Its okay. You’re okay,” he responded, one hand coming up to rest on her cheek. Her skin was softer than he remembered.
“Emilia?” she questioned. Her voice was faint and weak, making him wonder what the fuck had just happened.
“She’s okay, too. You protected her. You didn’t let go,” he told her. “She’s okay, baby. And so are you.” She offered him a smile that was crooked and weak. And then her eyes fluttered shut. Johnny stared at her for a few seconds, worry climbing up his throat to choke him. Jesus, God, someone. She needed help.
Panic flooded him, made his heart beat so hard against his ribs that he thought it might burst through them. Made his hands shake and his brain turn to mush. Oh, God. What if she was seriously hurt? What if she was going to die? He needed her. He needed to tell her that he loved her and he didn’t want to let her go. That he didn’t care about Summers or anything. “Haley? Baby? Come on, baby. Wake up. Stay with me. Please?”
There was no response. Worse, the spot in his head where the link was supposed to be was nothing but fuzz.
Tears stung his eyes and the weeks of pain and misery came boiling out as he shouted at the top of his lungs. “Somebody fucking help me!”
Chapter Forty One: Breaking Point
Fandom: the Marvel universe
Rating: 18 and up
Warnings: graphic violence, language, sex, dark themes, anything else i can toss in.
Disclaimer: the recognizable characters and places contained herein are the property of Marvel. i'm merely borrowing for the sake of entertainment. no money is being made from this venture. Haley belongs to
dazzledfirestar Morgan belongs toginevra Roxxy belongs tonanaeanaven Jehnna belongs to silverfox_chan and Dare belongs to me. the concept and title of The Mary Sue Virus are used with permission from dazzledfirestar . Author's Notes: this is almost entirely Daz's fault. okay. so it really isn't. its actually almost 100% my fault. Daz just did a whole lot of encouraging. this fic is going to be kind of dark, so please keep that in mind while reading.
Among the Strong - the index
She was cowed by a baby. A tiny human being had her, one of the strongest telepaths on the planet, afraid of it. The whole thing would have been laughable had it not been so pathetic. Had it been happening to someone else. This whole thing was turning out to be a disaster and she wasn’t sure how she was going to turn it around. How in the world was she being thwarted by a newborn?
She liked to think she was capable of dealing with new situations, that she was good at handling new people. The problem was, she couldn’t use her normal methods with a baby. There were no thought processes to use as a guide. There was no way to drop a mental suggestion here and there to push things in a direction she wanted them to go. Whatever thoughts a baby had were too ephemeral and short to really touch. To shift and shape. They weren’t even really thoughts the way most people understood them. Just a vague, fleeting thing that had no shape or feel to it. She’d never tell anyone she’d tried. It was humiliating that she’d been so unsuccessful with her attempt to convince her husband’s baby to like her as much as her mother. Maybe better. And she’d never live it down if she admitted doing such a thing to anyone.
Taking a breath, she made another attempt to hold the girl. With careful movements, she once more lifted the child from her little bounce chair into her arms. And, as with every other attempt she’d made, the moment the baby was cradled against her chest, the squalling started anew. Loudly. Unendingly. Annoyingly.
God, her head hurt.
The whole time spent with the child had been like this. The child simply wouldn’t stop crying, no matter what she did. She’d tried using a soft, sweet voice. She’d tried singing. She’d tried gently bouncing the girl. She’d tried rocking the girl. She’d tried everything she could think of to convince the baby to quit crying. None of it had worked and all that noise was giving her one hell of a headache. She turned wide, confused eyes Scott’s way and made sure she looked appropriately sad and kind of pathetic. “I don’t understand it! What am I doing wrong?” Jean asked, her voice wet with the threat of tears.
It had been her idea to help Scott take care of the child. Some part of her still felt like she could convince him to allow her to adopt the girl as her own. Since it didn’t seem like he was going to give up playing father to her. She’d thought, if she showed him that she could be a mother, too, that he’d be willing to entertain the idea of Jean becoming her mother. But every time she picked up the girl, all she did was cry and wail. It was very frustrating.
“I don’t know, Jean,” Scott said, reaching over to scoop the baby out of her arms. She got the distinct idea that he was growing tired of her behavior. She swore she’d seen him roll his eyes, despite the fact that there really wasn’t any way to be certain. Damn the glasses. “Emilia never cries like this.”
The moment he settled the baby in his arms, she quieted and stared up at him with big brown eyes that were so much like his. There was unconditional love in the girl’s gaze. And her lips shifted into what looked like a tiny smile. Something about the idea that he could calm the girl so easily rubbed Jean the wrong way. Even worse was the implication that the baby had never once cried like this with Haley. “Then I guess that means there’s something wrong with me,” she responded, voice tart with her irritation.
Scott turned to look her way. She didn’t have to see his eyes to know that he was staring at her in a way that she wouldn’t like. Finally, after a long moment of silent staring, Scott offered her a smile that held pity. “There’s no shame in not being able to quiet Emilia’s crying, Jean. Not everyone is cut out to be a mother.”
The comment was like a knife to the heart. She was almost one hundred percent sure that Scott had meant it to sound like the insult it was. But she couldn’t be certain because, as the days had passed since his return, her ability to read his thoughts had gotten more difficult. As if he was shielding them from her. Or as if something was interfering with the ability. She didn’t like that idea one bit.
Uncharitable thoughts filled her head. Ones about how some of the members of Purple Team weren’t cut out to be mothers. She didn’t think Jehnna or Roxxy were terrible in the mothering department. They were both gentle women by nature, nurturing and kind. Technically, she didn’t have issues with Haley as a mother. She just had issues with the woman being mother to her husband’s daughter. And she wouldn’t get into just how unsuited for parenting she felt both Morgan and Dare were.
There was no way she would give voice to her opinions, though. She felt certain, deep in her heart, that Scott would defend the two women. She really had nothing against them as X-Men. Their team was well put together. They worked so well with one another that it almost seemed as if they’d worked together all their lives. And even beyond. Individually, however, she wasn’t sure she liked all of them as people.
She pushed thoughts of Purple Team aside and focused on the here and now. Scott still cradled the child to his chest, the soft smile he wore gentling the usual seriousness on his face. It was a look that made her heart beat a little faster, that made her feel soft and warm on the inside. But it also made her heart ache because the look should have been for their child. And then her heart ached some more when she recalled that he’d given that look to Haley. She’d seen him do it with her own two eyes. He’d no doubt done it many, many times during their captivity.
The sound of the baby fussing brought her out of her thoughts. That tiny face was screwed up with displeasure, obviously on the way toward a full blown cry. Scott bounced and rocked the girl to no avail. For a moment, Jean felt a perverse sense of satisfaction that he seemed to be having issues with his daughter. “Okay, sweetheart. I understand. You’re hungry,” Scott said, offering the baby that same soft smile. He continued to rock from side to side, his attention focused solely on his daughter. “I guess that means its time to take you back to your mother so she can feed you.”
Was it Jean’s imagination or did Scott sound a little happy about that?
“I’ll be back in a little bit, Jean. I’m just going to take Emilia back to Haley,” Scott told her, already in the process of gathering up the few things he’d pulled out of the bag they’d brought with them when they’d picked the baby up some hours ago.
“I’ll come with you, Scott,” Jean replied, keeping the relief she felt out of her words. He gave her a look for a moment, then shrugged a shoulder.
“If you really want to. All I’m doing is handing Emilia off to Haley.”
“Still. This was my idea. I should, at the least, be along when you return her,” Jean insisted. She was getting an odd feeling from him and there was no way she was about to let him go down there by himself. There was no telling just what he and Haley would get up to if she didn’t keep an eye on them. She could still plainly see him sitting in bed with the other woman, arms around her, while he stared at the child she held with a look of wonder on his face. And she could still hear him telling Haley he loved her. She could still hear the depth of feeling he’d put into those words. And she could still feel the pain that lanced through her, as fresh and as sharp as it had been that very day.
Maybe there was too much insistence in her voice. Or too much emotion. Because Scott shot her a look that made her think he knew something was going on. But the moment passed and he nodded his head in agreement. “Very well. If you like.”
She didn’t really like, but she wasn’t about to tell him that, So she took the baby bag from him and looped it over her shoulder, then allowed him to hold the door for her. They stepped out into the hall, the silence between them strained and crackling with tension. She got the impression he really hadn’t wanted to agree with her decision. But telling her so would have created problems and he had been trying so hard not to create any further problems for them. To be honest, she thought he’d been walking on egg shells around her. She mostly disliked it, because it felt like they were drifting further and further apart every day. But she also liked it far more than she wanted to admit, but something about his careful behavior made her feel powerful.
They rode the elevator down to the sub-basement level on which the suites were located. Scott rocked the baby the entire time, singing to her softly in an endearingly off-key way. Once upon a time, he’d sung to Jean in the same voice. That wasn’t something that happened anymore and she felt that she could lay the blame for that at Haley’s feet.
It felt like she blamed Haley for a lot of her problems lately.
It didn’t take long to reach their chosen floor and the doors slid open to an empty hallway. Scott started forward, not bothering to wait and allow Jean out of the elevator before him. She followed behind him, her temper slowly building. It wasn’t like him to step through any door before her. He’d always made of point of allowing her to go through before he did. It was one of the things she’d always loved about him. So many people saw him as uptight and seriously. But she’d gotten to know him, gotten to see the gentler side of him. And Scott was always a gentleman. This behavior… It was so unlike him.
They arrived at the door to the suite where Haley was presently residing and Scott took one hand away from his baby in order to rap his knuckles against the wooden panel. After several moments, the door opened. Haley looked as if she’d been sleeping, her hair mussed and a robe thrown on over whatever it was she wore underneath. For a moment, just the barest stretch of time, she smiled at Scott. Then she noticed Jean and the smile slid away and a blank expression settled onto her face.
Jean’s temper jumped up another notch.
“I didn’t expect you back so soon,” Haley said. Scott offered her a faintly embarrassed look before glancing down at the baby.
“Emilia is getting fussy. I think she’s hungry,” he replied. The tone of his voice made Jean think he wasn’t certain about his assessment. She had to fight not to frown at the two of them. “I’m sorry for waking you. I didn’t think you’d be sleeping.”
Haley shrugged a shoulder, as if it wasn’t a big deal. The shoulder of her robe shifted to expose an expanse of pale skin. Jean couldn’t miss the way Scott seemed to react. As if that small patch of flesh was enough to turn him on. “Dare is out. Logan came to collect her a while ago. I thought I’d take advantage of the quiet to try and get a nap in. Between her and Emilia, sleep is sometimes hard to come by.”
“How’s Dare doing?” The question came out sounding casual, but there was something in Scott’s posture that pointed toward tension. Jean knew him well enough to see the signs. She knew he valued all of his X-Men so it made sense he’d ask. But it almost felt like something more than common courtesy. Curious.
“She’s getting better. She’s got her appetite fully back and she’s working on getting her strength back. She can make it across her bedroom now without help.”
“That’s good. I’m glad,” he told her. The baby took that moment to start whimpering. It prompted Scott to shift her from his hold into Haley’s arms. Jean frowned when the baby quieted immediately, her mouth rooting around against Haley’s chest. Scott was silent a moment, then he raked a hand through his hair. “You know you can call on me to watch Emilia if you need to sleep. I don’t like the idea that you’re wearing yourself out by taking care of both Emilia and Dare without help.”
For a moment, there was a flash of emotion in Haley’s eyes. Then she shifted her attention to the baby in her arms. “I’m fine, Scott. And Dare has other people to look after her. I’m not the only one.”
“You need someone to look after you,” he said softly. Even so, there was no missing the emotion laced through his words. It made Jean want to reach out and slap Haley. How dare she make Scott fall in love with her! He was a married man. He belonged to Jean.
“I’m fine, Scott,” Haley repeated.
“Damn it, Haley,” Scott snapped. He fell silent, then, but Jean got the distinct impression that there was something going on. The few times she’d seen the two of them together, she’d gotten the same impression. In fact, she felt like Scott had a better understanding of what was happening with Haley than he let on. “You’re exhausting yourself. I can tell.”
There was certainty in his voice that bothered Jean. Like he literally knew it for a fact. There’d been a lot of that lately, That mysterious certainty that she wasn’t sure she liked. She’d been noticing things like that since he’d returned to the school. He’d been acting like he knew what Haley was actually feeling. Like when she’d gone into labor. Scott had just woken up and gone off like he’d… known.
Jean frowned. She was suddenly reminded of the link Haley had formed with both Piotr and Johnny after the alien life form had invaded. The professor had never figured out the purpose or how the bond had formed. But Jean knew Haley had used it to hunt down and rescue Johnny when Doom had captured the Fantastic Four. Was it possible that she’d formed a bond with Scott? They’d spent a year locked in a room together, after all.
That had to be it. Haley had created a link between herself and Scott. And it was interfering with Scott’s relationship with Jean. It was messing with his head, making him think he loved the other woman. Pulling him away from the life he’d made with Jean. Destroying the life they’d made together.
“Really, Scott. I’m okay.” Jean barely heard the words. Her blood was boiling, rage making thinking next to impossible. She was lost to the idea that Haley was trying to steal Scott away from her. That he was pulling away from her in favor of the other woman. And there was nothing she could do to stop it.
No. That wasn’t right. There absolutely was something she could do. Tuning out the faint argument Haley and Scott were having, Jean let her powers expand, let them slip into Haley’s mind. She let it touch thoughts and memories, her temper shooting higher when she caught flashes of intimate moments, of soft sigh and seeking hands and bodies twisting and shifting in unison. Of completion and pleasure and desire and happiness and belonging so intense that it almost stole her breath. She pushed on, putting distance between herself and those memories, until she found what she was looking for.
There was a small room in Haley’s mind that held three different glowing balls of light. The faintest one was a silvery-blue, a sense of gentleness emanating from it that said it was the link she’d formed with Piotr. The second was a twisting ball of flame. Jean didn’t have to touch it to know it was the link that connected her to Johnny. The third and final ball of bright red, like the optic blasts that were representative of Scott’s power. Both it, and the fire ball, glowed with the same intensity, suggesting they were both strong. Suggesting Haley’s connection to the two men they represented was strong.
Not for much longer.
Jean gathered her powers around her and slipped them around the link. She thought she vaguely heard Scott and Haley fall silent and gasp in surprise. But she ignored them and focused on that link. She shaped her powers into a hammer and swung them with all her might, aiming for the ball.
“Jean, what the hell are you doing?” Scott’s voice was faint and distant. Her hammer slammed up against the ball. She swore she heard it hit, like a hammer coming down against an anvil. Sparks flew, the glowing red of Scott’s power. Then they were white, burning bright and brighter as they flew toward her. Jean tried to erect a shield, but the white light enveloped her. Pain ran through her, white-hot and electrical, making her think she’d been struck by lightning.
It was the last thought she had before the white light vanished and left nothing but darkness in its wake.
~*~*~*~*~
Dare stared at the door before her, fear and trepidation spiraling through her like a tornado. The two emotions chewed up everything in their path until she was left frozen, unable to convince herself to take that last step forward. Opening that door, going through it into the room beyond, was suddenly the last thing she wanted to do.
“You’re stallin’ fer no reason, Dare. It’ll all be okay,” Logan said gently. He was at her side, one arm wound around her in a protective measure. It was also to help hold her up, physically as well as mentally. She was getting stronger, but she still wobbled more than she didn’t, and she was silently thankful for his presence. “They ain’t gonna care about what happened.”
She glanced to the baby held securely in her arms, arms that she pretended weren’t shaking a little, before shifting her attention to his face. There was a faint smile pulling his mouth up as he looked back, and the clear blue of his eyes was filled with certainty.
“I thought I was ready for this. But its starting to feel like I was wrong,” she whispered. He lifted a brow at her response, his look turning questioning.
“The Dare I know ain’t scared of nothing’,” he responded, his voice bright with belief and emphasis.
She looked away, her gaze returning to the closed panel. “I’m scared of everything, Logan,” she whispered. It was a painful truth, one that was hard to admit. But it was still the truth. If she was going to try and repair her relationships with everyone, if she was serious about dealing with her problems, she had to let some of the armor she’d crafted crack apart. Let it fall away to expose the vulnerable parts of her that had lain hidden beneath for far, far too long.
“You think I don’t know that, darlin’?” he asked, his voice as soft as hers. She turned to look at him again. The smile had faded, replaced by a look of seriousness that seemed much more at home on his face. Come to think of it, she’d seen the serious look a lot more back when she’d first met him. The smiling hadn’t really become a thing until they’d become a couple. He had so many different types of smiles and they all made him look like a different person. She didn’t know what she’d done to deserve those smiles, but she was determined to earn each and every one of them. As well as the ones that would follow.
“You never said anything,” she replied steadily.
“You ain’t a hero because you’re not scared of anything,” he told her. “Being scared of things makes you human, Facing the things you fear, fightin’ despite being afraid… That’s what makes ya a hero. And you gotta be one of the bravest people I know.”
The stark, genuine honesty in his voice brought tears to her eyes. She glanced away, staring at Petra’s face while she willed the tears to go away. She didn’t understand how he was always so kind and gentle with her. Especially not now when all this had happened. Then again, she’d never understood just what it was he’d seen in her all those years ago. She’d been a scared, royally fucked up kid with so many issues. Hell, she was still scared and royally fucked up. With all those original issues and an added bonus of so many more. Only now she was masquerading as an adult.
When she finally had herself together, she looked back up at him with a hint of a smile on her face. “Thank you, Logan,” she told him quietly. “For everything.”
“There’s no reason ta thank me, Dare. I love ya,” he responded, as if that explained everything. And maybe it did. She still felt like she didn’t deserve it. But she was going to do her best to not belittle that gift by giving voice to her doubts. She knew for a fact that Logan didn’t deserve hearing her say that about him and the love he so freely and willingly gave her.
“I love you, too,” she replied. And she did. She didn’t know when or how or why she’d fallen in love with him. But she had. And she kind of felt like they were the weirdest, oddest couple ever. She also felt like she wouldn’t have made it this far without him at her side. Knowing he was going to be by her side for what was beyond that wooden panel helped her draw her bravery around herself. And she reached determinedly for the door, twisting the knob so she could push it open.
Dare had barely made it over the threshold before the lights came on and a group of excited children called out “Surprise!” in the best inside voices she’d ever heard them use. Petra stirred slightly in her arms, but otherwise remained quiet and not at all startled. She let her eyes take in the scene before her, very much confused and in a bit of shock.
It was the suite that she’d been meant to share with Remy. It remained unfinished, with a single couch and a pair of chairs taking up space in the middle of the floor. End tables with lamps settled upon them and a coffee table that looked heavy rounded out the only furniture in the room. The ceiling was covered from wall to wall with balloons. They were the same shades of blue and purple as the streaks that colored her hair. And soft pink, obviously meant to welcome Petra. Someone had gone overboard with cheesy crepe paper streamers that proclaimed, in pink words, ‘Its at girl!’, covering every inch of all four walls with the stuff. Between the streamers and the balloons, it looked like a movie version of someone’s high school prom.
The coffee table was laden with snack foods and drinks. There were so many snacks and drinks, in fact, that someone had set a card table up in the corner to hold the rest of them. And there was yet another table, a smaller one, that held an array of brightly wrapped packages. A lump formed in Dare’s throat while tears filled her eyes. Love swelled in her chest. The love she felt for her children. And the love they felt for her. She was left wondering how she’d ever believed that her children would look at her and see a dirty, filthy whore. “My poppets,” she said softly, voice watery with tears and thick with all of the love she had for her family.
She hated herself for almost destroying all of this.
“Come on, darlin’,” Logan said, standing at her side. The arm he had around her nudged her into motion and she headed toward the couch. Almost before she was settled, her children were crowding around her.
“Mumma! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!” Cam and Ken chanted joyously.
Jessalyn climbed up onto the couch beside Dare, sitting as close to her as she could get without crawling into her lap. Her gaze was fixed on Petra, who stared back at Jess intently. Logan took a seat on Dare’s other side, one hand reaching out to very gently stroke a finger over Petra’s cheek. It was an odd, cozy picture. One she’d never expected to see and one for which she was so terribly grateful.
“We missed you, mum,” Liam said, voice rough and low. Dare put that down to embarrassment. She made no comment on his discomfort, instead offering him a smile that might have wobbled. Just a little bit.
“I missed you, too, love,” she said, her gaze locked on his face. She knew her son felt like the odd one out. How could he not, surrounded as he was by nothing but sisters. So she tried, as much as she could, to make sure he knew he was just as amazing and special as the rest of his siblings. She didn’t miss the way his ears reddened before he turned away to go mess around at the secondary snack table. Then she turned her attention to the rest of her children, letting her gaze rest on their faces one by one. “I missed all of you so much. I can’t believe you did all this for me!”
“And for our new sister,” Jess pointed out, her little hand motioning toward Petra to ensure Dare didn’t forget she was there.
“Of course,” she responded with a smile. She let her gaze slide around the room once more, this time letting it touch on each of her children. Cam and Ken stood at her knees, both eyeing her sister like she was a new toy to play with. Dare was sure they knew better, but they were still young. Jess was practically vibrating with joy as she sat beside her mother, her attention entirely on the baby Dare held. Liam was still at the snack table, his back to them. No doubt he was trying to get his embarrassment under control so he looked cool and calm and not at all like a lost little boy who thought he’d never see his mother again. She finally found Dee, who sat in one of the chairs. She’d pulled her knees up to her chest, her arms wrapped around her legs while her chin rested on her bent knees. She looked like the same little girl she’d always been. And she looked like a young woman, just coming into her prime. She saw Dare staring and smiled a wide, sweet, genuinely happy smile.
“Mumma.” Cameron said, her little girl’s voice filled with as much seriousness as she could fit into it. It brought Dare’s gaze back to the children at her knees. Cam was staring at Petra now, her gaze intense and considering.
“Yes, poppet. What is it?” she asked, giving her attention to the girl.
“Uncle Remy is Petra’s Da?” she asked. There was a moment where she stumbled over Petra’s name, but her question was clear enough.
“He is,” Dare confirmed. She had no doubt that Logan had already talked to their children about Petra’s parentage, but she’d been asked a question directly and she wasn’t going to lie. Not even to the youngest of her offspring. She’d have to explain it to them someday, but it wasn’t that day yet.
Cam nodded and turned to look at Mckenna. The two of them stared at one another for several long moments before they turned to look at Dare. “Uncle Remy is Da now?” Ken asked, voice filled with confusion and curiosity.
“No, poppet. Da is still your da,” she told the girl, one hand reaching out to rest on Logan’s leg. “Uncle Remy is still Uncle Remy, unless he decides he wants to be something else. But that’s up to him. And you have to have his permission to call him something else. For now, keep calling him Uncle Remy. Okay?”
Cam and Ken shared a second look before they turned back to her and nodded their heads. “Okay.”
“Mumma?” The word came from beside her. Dare turned her attention to Jessalyn.
“What is it, my girl?” she asked.
“Can I hold Petra?” Jess’ voice was a mix of hope and fear. She likely thought she was going to be told no.
“Of course you can,” Dare replied. “First, you need to sit up straight. And then cross your legs.” Jess did as she was told, straightening her back and bringing her legs up to sit with them crossed so that they created a natural cradle. Dare shifted slightly, turning so that it would be easier to settle Petra in Jess’ lap. “One arm under her head to support it, poppet. And don’t get flustered if she starts crying. Babies will cry if they don’t feel safe.”
“Okay, Mumma,” Jess nodded. Dare shifted Petra into Jess’ lap, making sure one of her arms was positioned under Petra’s head so that it was properly supported. There was a moment or two of fussing, then Jess got Petra settled comfortably and the fussing quieted. Petra stared up at her sister with wide eyes, bringing a big smile to Jess’ face.
“You look better, Mum,” Dee said. She’d left her seat while Dare had been putting Petra in Jess’ lap and now stood near the couch. Her eyes were focused intently on Dare’s face and her smile had dimmed some. “I was worried.”
Dare heard what Dee hadn’t said. She’d been scared. No doubt she’d been imagining all kinds of things the past few weeks. She wasn’t sure how Dee’s visions worked. They hadn’t gotten a chance to talk about it much. But it was possible they’d shown her things that had fueled her worry and fear. Dare got to her feet and wrapped Dee up in her embrace. She made sure to put her mouth next to Dee’s ear. “I’m so sorry I worried you, poppet,” Dare whispered so that she was sure no one else, save Logan, would be able to hear her.
Dee hugged her almost too tightly, as if afraid to let go. “I knew you would be okay. But I still worried.” You still scared me.
It felt like it took ages for Dee to loosen her grip. When she did, Dare pulled away to see that her eyes glimmered with tears. Logan had told her that Dee was the one who’d held everyone together while Dare had been gone. While she’d been hiding and doing… whatever the fuck it was she’d been doing. Now that the danger had passed and everything was finally over, Dee’s naturally happy personality was giving way to the fear and worry she hadn’t shown to anyone. Dare’s heart squeezed tight with the knowledge that she’d hurt her daughter like this. How did she fix it? Words wouldn’t do the trick.
The only way she could think of was to show Dee, and everyone else, that she was going to do better. To be better. She squeezed Dee this time, hugging her so tightly that her daughter squeaked in her hold. When she let go, she pressed a kiss to Dee’s cheek. A silent promise to be the kind of mother she needed. To never let her down again.
“Enough of this emotional crap,” Liam’s voice, still rough, cut across the room and broke Dare away from Dee. They turned to look at him and found he was holding one of the brightly wrapped gifts in his hand. “Let’s open these presents and get this party started.”
Cam and Ken jumped up and down, clapping and cheering at the suggestion. Jess, still cradling her sister close, nodded her head in agreement. Even Dee, when Dare looked at her, was smiling. She motioned to the couch, silently telling Dare she should return to her seat. So she sat, taking her place next to Logan. He slung an arm around her shoulder and drew her close, dropping a kiss on her cheek before leaning in so he could speak in her ear. “Told ya you were worried for nothin’. The kids love ya. And so do I,” he said, one of his hands taking hers and squeezing it gently.
Liam brought the gift and settled it into her lap, silently telling her to open it. Dare’s fingers tugged lightly at the bow on the top, a pale mint green that somehow went with the pastel pink wrapping paper. The bow came off easily enough, as did the paper it had been sitting on. Inside the box was a set of rattles, teething rings, and pacifiers. A card had been left inside the box. She took the time to read the sentiment written in the card. And then she looked at the signature. Liam had signed his name as neatly as he could inside the card, along with ‘I love you.’
Dare felt her heart swell and warmth washed through her. She was once more reminded that she had amazing, wonderful children. And she was going to do everything she could to ensure that she showed them how much she loved them.
Every day.
For the rest of her life.
~*~*~*~*~
Johnny stared at the button, his feet willing to obey the orders his brain had given him. Just a few steps forward. Lift one hand. Use a finger to push the button. That was all he had to do. But doubt was rearing its ugly head, making his brain rebel against the idea of doing so. Because actually doing it meant he had to put his anger aside and really, truly, make an attempt at communication.
He’d spent several days thinking on his conversation with Peter. Really thinking. Because Pete had made so many good points. Johnny had been going around with his head up his ass. He hadn’t stopped once to think about Haley and what she’d been going through. He owed her an apology for doing that. And for walking away from her the way he had. He knew just how bad things had gotten. He’d never seen her crack the way she had that night when Dare had almost died. He was certain she was shouldering all of her problems, and taking one some that didn’t even exist because she felt she’d failed her team. He’d been with her long enough to know how she thought.
He needed to step forward and activate the portal. He needed to be a man about the whole thing and remind Haley that he loved her. And it didn’t matter that Emilia was Summers’ child. Johnny would love her like one of his own. How could he not? She was Haley’s daughter. Hell, he was even willing to make peace with Summers. He knew Haley would never deny the man his child. Maybe, if he could set things right with the other man, he could teach his son how to be a man that anybody would be proud to know. He’d gone wrong with Spencer somewhere and he didn’t know where. Worse, he didn’t know how to make it better. But he couldn’t help Spencer fix his issues if Johnny didn’t first fix his own.
Taking a breath, he paced forward three steps and brought one hand up. Used a finger to press the button. The mechanical part of the portal hummed and whirred. Then it opened and showed him the suite where Haley was staying. After another fortifying breath, Johnny stepped forward.
Haley was at the door when he came through. The door, which stood open and showed him Scott and Jean standing on the other side. Summers’ jaw was tensed, marking him as unhappy about something. Jean looked… Johnny couldn’t be sure what the expression on the woman’s face meant. But something skittered down his spine, as if in warning, and he found himself in motion before he understood why.
“Really, Scott,” Haley was saying. She sounded slightly defensive. And tired. Johnny could hear the exhaustion in her voice. Worse, he could feel it. It carried to him through their link. “I’m okay.”
Summers’ face said he didn’t believe it. And he looked like he wanted to say something. His mouth opened, maybe to call Haley on her bullshit. But he said nothing, instead turning his attention to the woman standing at his side. There was a hint of shock and anger on his face. “Jean, what the hell are you doing?” Johnny thought he heard a faint thread of pain in the man’s voice. Johnny watched in confusion as Summers staggered backward, into the wall directly behind him, where he slid limply to the floor. And then he saw the look on Jean’s face, one of confusion and fear. It was gone in a moment, replaced by a mask of pain and a soundless scream. Jean hit the floor hard and didn’t move.
Fear pulsed through him as his attention turned to Haley. It was to see she wobbled where she stood, her body kind of propped up against the door. She was going to go down and he couldn’t, he wouldn’t, let that happen. Johnny put on some speed, praying to whomever was listening to grant him the strength to reach her before she went down. His heart was in his throat, along with the sharp taste of bile brought on by the rush of fear. The room was a blur around him, his focus entirely on Haley as she seemed to teeter in slow motion. Jesus fuck, she was going to go down and he wouldn’t get there in time.
“Haley!” he called out.
And then she was cradled in his arms. He was sitting on his ass on the floor and Haley was cradled safely in his arms. She was white, her eyes open and rolled up. He could see her mouth working, but nothing was coming out. God, she was soft and real in his arms. Relief rushed through him. But it only lasted a moment,
Because a baby’s sharp cry, one filled with fear, reached his ears and he realized that Haley had Emilia cradled in her arms. He didn’t know what had happened, but he thought it was a safe bet that Jean was somehow involved. “Johnny?” Haley asked, her green eyes sort of looking at his face. It was obvious she couldn’t focus on him. Hell, she probably didn’t even really see him.
“Shh. Its me, babe. I’m here. Don’t worry. Its okay. You’re okay,” he responded, one hand coming up to rest on her cheek. Her skin was softer than he remembered.
“Emilia?” she questioned. Her voice was faint and weak, making him wonder what the fuck had just happened.
“She’s okay, too. You protected her. You didn’t let go,” he told her. “She’s okay, baby. And so are you.” She offered him a smile that was crooked and weak. And then her eyes fluttered shut. Johnny stared at her for a few seconds, worry climbing up his throat to choke him. Jesus, God, someone. She needed help.
Panic flooded him, made his heart beat so hard against his ribs that he thought it might burst through them. Made his hands shake and his brain turn to mush. Oh, God. What if she was seriously hurt? What if she was going to die? He needed her. He needed to tell her that he loved her and he didn’t want to let her go. That he didn’t care about Summers or anything. “Haley? Baby? Come on, baby. Wake up. Stay with me. Please?”
There was no response. Worse, the spot in his head where the link was supposed to be was nothing but fuzz.
Tears stung his eyes and the weeks of pain and misery came boiling out as he shouted at the top of his lungs. “Somebody fucking help me!”
